Back in the beginning of the year, I set myself some words for the year.
Remember.
Legacy
Inspire
Jessence
Fearless
My goal was to live life with those five words in mind. Remembering the important, focused on what I leave behind, inspiring others, embracing myself, and facing fear head on.
One week into November, and I’m fairly happy with how far I’ve come. Obviously, there is always room for improvement, but on the whole, I can say that I have grown this year.
I’m the sort of person who is not content to just live life going from day to day. I want more. I want to be constantly learning, constantly improving, constantly getting better.
I want to shine.
Maybe be famous.
I want to count for something, even if the only thing I ever do is understand the value of one.
I’m not content to just sit on the couch.
I will be more.
I was born Jessica Deborah (insert Maiden name here), but I’ve very rarely been called Jessica. When I was little, my dad and sisters called me Jessie-Deb. My cousin called me Junk-Food-Jess. My friends have always called me Jess. Old people call me Jessie.
Boatman calls me Jessbo.
Whatever the word, I’ve always been some variation of Jess.
Just Jess.
Whenever I thought of myself, I’ve aways added the ‘just’ to my name. I don’t know why, but I have.
Growing up, I didn’t have a very high opinion of myself really. I wasn’t popular or pretty. I didn’t seem to really have a whole lot to offer. My friends referred to me as ‘the token female’ or ‘the girl next door.’ We’ve all seen that girl in the movies; it never seems to go very well for her.
I was mostly ok with that. I was me.
Just me.
Just Jess.
A stay at home mum, doing my best to love my kids and raise them to be awesome human beings.
This year, something has started to change.
I can’t put my finger on how or why, or even when, but I know it’s been happening.
I’ve stopped adding the ‘just.’
I’ve never really done anything ‘substantial’ by most peoples standards. I haven’t finished Uni, or had a real job. I’ve only ever been a mum my adult life. I don’t have any area of expertise unless you ask me about my kids.
From the outside looking in, there really is nothing remarkable about me at all.
I am just Jess.
But….
I’m so much more.
How do I word this without sounding arrogant? I’m not sure, but I’m not.
I have this belief, inside me, right down in my core. A firm conviction that I can not adequately give words to except to say that it is my truth, and I can not be swayed from it.
I firmly, one hundred percent believe, without a shadow of any kind of doubt, that I was made personally, and intimately by the very hand of God, and because of that reason, I am anything but ‘just.’
Having said that, I am realising that being me, is the very best thing I can be. Embracing all my Jessence and understanding that ‘just’ being Jess, is exactly what I was designed for.
I am Just Jess, but I am not just Jess.
I’m Essentially Jess.
Authentic. Hopeful. And a little bit crazy.
I started the year with five words,hoping they would help me grow. What I didn’t expect, was to find so much of my own worth in seeking them.
But even more importantly, I never imagined that in finding my own value, I would begin to glimpse so much more of the value in others. Because there is no purpose in living just for yourself. Human beings are hard-wired for community; we seek to be with people. And by embracing this community here, on line, particularly on a Tuesday, I catch glimpses of not only my own greatness, but the greatness of others.
The greatness of you.
Your beauty.
Your wisdom.
Your frailties.
And so, it is with the utmost conviction, that I believe there is nothing ‘just’ about you either.
And I don’t just say this. These are not empty words on a page. A nice post to tickle your eyes and ears, and make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
This, for me, is truth.
And you all told me, when I had nothing to say, to speak to my truth.
So there it is. I am me. Just Jess, and yet nothing Just about me.
Now on another note….
What’s with the duck?
When planning this move, I was looking for an image that would adequately describe crazy, and that didn’t involve me looking like a psycho woman. I found this duck, and thought he was cool, but I wasn’t sure.
Anyway, I left him sitting on the header, to see of he should stay or not. Whilst in discussions with Michelle from Little Hero Host about the necessity of the duck, a crazy pigeon literally flew into my house and launched itself at the ceiling fan, before flying out again.
It could have been a crazy duck for the analogy it gave.
So the duck stayed, and now I’m owning the duck. It’s a crazy chick just like me.
(And also, who doesn’t love a dancing duck?)
You know, they say having a bird fly into your house is a sign of good luck. Even better if they poop on your head
x
I always make a conscious effort to avoid using the word, “Just” – for all the reasons that you’ve beautifully mentioned.
Loving your new play here. Especially the duck
Grace recently posted..Then, They Were Twins
I did not know that about birds!
But between you and me, I’ll skip the poop on the head.
Great post! You are amazing and made perfectly. God doesn’t make mistakes
Rachel x
Rachel from Redcliffe Style recently posted..How I pick my Melbourne Cup horse
No He doesn’t
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I love the way you described the ‘just’. I have a similar story with my name – I’ll tell you about it sometime. I love the new blog, it suits you down to the ground xx
Catherine Rodie Blagg recently posted..Gunpowder, Treason and Plot!
Oh I’d like to hear that story. It’s funny cause I’m ok with being just Jess now that I think of it differently.
But essentially Jess makes it sound much better.
Naww I love this post!
You are such a beautiful person Jess, how much you care for others and yourself is really inspiring. I love not just being a number when I come to your link up, (or Grace’s FYBF) I feel like a valued member of the blogging community.
I love the duck, it sums it up perfectly.. and super cute to boot.
iSophie recently posted..Beach bums and tantrums.
You are a valued member of the community. I honestly love people here so much! Tuesday is definitely my favourite day of the week cause I get to visit everyone. I jut wish I could do it every other day of the week too!
This is one of those posts where I want to comment straight away, but I need to think over it for a while – roll them over in my head and find what I’m trying to say. What I will say is that I love the idea of finding words to live up to and I think you’re doing that admirably with your blog. And I love the duck
Mel @ Adventures of a Subversive Reader recently posted..Three Months Old: A Letter to Squirm
I think having words is a really simple way to keep you focused. It’s made a huge difference to me this year.
I like being all different things to different people. It’s like I get to exercise all different parts of my personality, depending on who I’m with. So I have a collection of friends with different interests (but all MY interests) and we do different activites together. Still me but I don’t have to give up anything….
Lydia C. Lee recently posted..Growing old disgracefully
What a fantastic post. You found the perfect words. Well done on your move and your perspective. I’m linking up today for my first IBOT xx
I can’t leave comment love on the other posts right now, as I’m off to work, but I’ll try to make some quality blog-reading time tonight!
Francesca recently posted..20,000 Pageviews
Oh welcome! Love meeting new linkers! Enjoy your day, and your blog reading tonight!
Terrific post! I love the notion of having words to live by, and you’ve picked some beauties. But really, with regard to your comment about never really having done anything, look at those four gorgeous children! I’m sure they account for far more than a degree or a job. Xx
Kelly HTandT recently posted..The Baptism and Things That Get My Goat
Yes Kelly you are right, they really do. They are easily the best thing I’ve ever done.
I just meant in terms of ‘success’ as I guess most people define it.
Good thing we’re not most people hey?
I am so glad that you are happy with where you are at the moment. Sometimes when we realise that we don’t actually feel as though we fit in, it can be hard to get to a place of happiness and accept where we are.
I know this, cause I am trying to find that happy place. Love the new blog too.
Lisa recently posted..Ultra Care+ Micro-Dermabrasion Kit from Nutrimetics
There is so much freedom when you finally start to feel comfortable in your own skin. I never imagined it would feel so good.
Ahh Jess, this post resonates with me. I am “only me”….as in it’s only me. I just realised that if I leave out the it’s and am left with only me, its not a bad description. I am only me, not anyone else. Only me is also striving to be better, only me is on my way to being sensational, only me is not a bad person to be. Thank you for the insight
Becc recently posted..Christmas Gratitude
Yes! I love it. Being ‘only you’ is awesome because why would you want to be anyone else? There’s so much joy in embracing being just or only who we are.
People really do need community and I think that the online community is also part of God’s plan to care for the people he has made. It is lovely that he is using you in this place, just as the person he created you to be.
Thanks Lisa.
It’s definitely not something I ever thought would happen, but i’ll embrace it.
My name is your middle name – ironically, I hated my name when I was growing up. (Still not keen on it now…) For most of my life, I really struggled with feeling like I was nothing special – it took me a long time to accept that God doesn’t make crap – there is beauty and unique potential in everyone. We are all made for a purpose, and we all have our own amazing talents to share with the world. There is definitely no ‘just’ about it.
Deb @ Aspiring Mum recently posted..The Courage To Be Kind.
I was nearly called Deborah! It was only that on of my sisters (and they all argue over which one!) suggested Jessica and mum and dad liked it.
Deb I honestly see you as such a beautiful, kind, gentle person. The world needs more people like you. The way you seek to inspire by aspiring, and helping mums manage, all those things are necessary and wonderful. I feel privileged to have got to ‘meet’ you.
love this, love you x
Lyndal recently posted..the one where i explore the whole no sugar thing
Love you too xx
Beautifully written as always Jess, and congratulations on your first IBOT in your new place!
I just want to say thank you.
I was feeling a little jealous (almost) reading this, at how you sound so happy with yourself, and I struggle with that most days. I’ve spent my life feeling ‘not good enough’, and even now I’m forty something, I still feel that way a lot.
But then reading the part about how you see the greatness in others brought tears to my eyes. Because I so desperately want others to see that in me. But more than that, I want to see that in myself.
You’ve inspired me to find some words of my own to live by. Words that describe me. And they’re going to be positive xx
Tracey @ Bliss Amongst Chaos recently posted..The November 30/30 Challenge – Day 6. Row, Row, Row Your Boat…
Oh Tracey, Thankyou! You have brought tears to my eyes.
I was so nervous about writing this because I didn’t want to come across as arrogant, and I wanted nothing more than to communicate that if I can start to see my value, than others can too.
You are an amazing person, and I really hope you can start to see that amzingness. It’s not the sort of thing that just happens over night. I think we need to choose to look for it, and finding some positive words to focus on is a great place to start.
Thanks so much for being part of this community. Xxxx
So true, Jess. I think adding ‘just’ before someone can (unintentionally) devalue it. Like saying “Just a mum” or “just a woman”. Embrace that new title, get it guuuurl x
Good Golly Miss Holly! recently posted..This weekend past, it felt like the world came to a standstill.
Uh, something not someone. I need more coffee.
Good Golly Miss Holly! recently posted..This weekend past, it felt like the world came to a standstill.
Didn’t even notice.
Evidently I need coffee too….
What a great post Jess! It explains the change of the blog and an awakening in yourself. I do believe that blogging can help to explore yourself and grow. I love that you are not longer thinking just Jess! And you obviously are already a little bit famouns!
Eleise recently posted..How I stay Slim! {10 Tips}
Nice of you to say so Eleise
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Love this post! Wonderful to hear you talk of how you have grown over the past year. I think the duck is perfect, makes sense to me
xx
I love the idea of being “authentically Jess”. Think I might concentrate on being “authentically Amanda” – I’m old enough now to recognise that there might be some value in that.
Amanda @ Cooker and a Looker recently posted..Real Men Eat Quiche: Kale, Bacon and Quinoa Quiche
Great post Jess! your an awesome person! I love reading your journey and I am so jelly over your duck
tarahleigh recently posted..Fingers crossed to find out!!!
Thanks for sharing this post. It is so wonderful to be able to reflect inwards. I love your words and the way they have inspired you. I am linking up for the first time today – what a great community. Love your new header and look! Cheers, Mez
Mez recently posted..Byron Bay – I love holidays!
So excited to have you Mez! Loving getting new blood
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
You are so much more than just Jess! Well done you, and love the new site xx
It’s been amazing knowing you online over the past year (has it already been more than a year)?? And you’ve never just been anything to me. You’re more than I expected from knowing someone I’ve never met before. If that makes sense
Ai Sakura recently posted..Kids Face Painting | Cute Kitty Cat! ネコネコ～
Total sense. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Just. Such a short word but oh so powerful. I’m glad you’re not referring to yourself as just a ‘just’ anymore if it’s in a negative way, nobody is just a ‘just’. But I ‘just’ looked through my blog posts and was amazed at the number of times I’ve used this word – not to refer to myself, but as a tongue-in-cheek, e.g.nobody much, JUST the richest man in the world, or ‘just because’ – to kind of imply that everyone is worth more than that. I agree with so many of your sentiments
Enid Bite’Em recently posted..Joe and Fred and Burglar Bill
You are doing awesomely Jess. I’ve witnessed the growth and I’m proud of how far you’ve come. So glad I made your aquaintance in time!
xxXOoo
I your love duck and the new style of your blog! You are far from being just Jess. You are one amazing and beautiful person!
Rita recently posted..The Liebster Award
This should read I love your duck and…
Rita recently posted..The Liebster Award
I got it
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I love the duck… and love this post. Recently my husband and I talked about writing a family mission statement (similar to your five words) to remind ourselves of how we want our family to live- the important things.
Housewife in Heels recently posted..Melbourne Cup winner
I like the duck, you’re quack! LOL, maybe you now you can start a duck face linky.
http://wp.me/p2KYo1-2T
You’re incredibly famous in my eyes! And I love the word “jessence”.
Happy Tuesday
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
Leanne@Deep Fried Fruit recently posted..Day 1128 – Melbourne Cup Today
Quacking good stuff, Jess
Love your mission x
Shari recently posted..And, they’re racing …
I, too, always refer to myself as ‘Just Jess’, but we Jess’ are a special breed and are so much more than just anything! I am glad that you have found that inner confidence to believe that!
The new blog looks great! And I just love the crazy duck!!
Jess really is an awesome name isn’t it?
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I bet you are missing my 3.30am random comments.. but this morning I had to get back to a lil miss who heard me get up.. but luckily she went straight back to sleep no tantrums! Win Win!!
So I love the duck.. I want the duck.. though I think if I was to adopt a dancing animal it would have to be an elephant.. because thats the type of animal that would dance on my blog!
Never thought of you as Just Jess.. so Essentially Jess suits you to a tee!
xx Quack Quack #teamIBOTWEJ!
Yvette Bowyer recently posted..cakepops and icecream afternoon
Always love your random early morning comments
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Watching you grow this year has been awesome Jess, I am glad that you are happy with how it is going. Seeing you get out there and live the dream is truly inspirational, can’t wait to see what happens next. Fairy wishes and butterfly kisses lovely
Rhianna recently posted..Tied in knots
You’re not Just Jess… you’re Essentially Jess…. and your Essentially Awesome!!!
Love you and that coot widdle ducky!!!! nawwwww!
Cass xo
Cassandra recently posted..Wrap Pants… Vintage of course…
I don’t want to meet the miserable person who doesn’t love a dancing duck.
See, I know you’re awesome because our nickname is very similar. My nephew started calling me Jaynesbo when he was a toddler, and for the last 16 years it’s stuck.
Jayne recently posted..What I Know About {Remembering}
Yeah that person sucks!
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Did you see that episode of Modern Family where the pigeon flys inside and Mitchell freaks out and literally destroys the inside of the house trying to get it out? Your words made me think of that.
You certainly are anything but just Jess, you’re a beautiful Mama to 4 little cherubs and you run an awesome community of amazing bloggers, and that’s just to name two things that you do. Definitely more than just Jess, maybe you should insert the word awesome between just and Jess!
Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions recently posted..We Need to Talk About Shopping
Loving the new site Jess! But just FYI, took me a bit of time to load…
Danya Banya recently posted..Pinterest, You Are Drunk!
It reminds me of “Just Jack” from will and grace. You are Jess and you are unique like all of us. Love the dancing duck. Just be you and you remind me to be me. Love reading your posts always.
Salz recently posted..32 Things that annoy me
What a gorgeous gorgeous post Jess. I love it when people allow their light to shine out instead of stomping it down within. You’re a beautiful person and it shines out loud and clear in this post!
Kelly Exeter recently posted..What I know about … Remembering
Thanks Kelly.
No point in hiding who you are. We weren’t made for that
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Sounds like it has all come together perfectly for you. Hope you are happy in your new home!!
Thanks for the link up!!
ann recently posted..I haven’t whinged for a while and a Thank you!!
Hi Jess, To me “Just Jess” means only YOU can be the Jess you are and God DID make a great job of you as that is the only kind of job he does. I don’t bog but I read a lot and am getting the impression he’d be very pleased with his creation in you. And please don’t under estimate the most valuable job that has been entrusted to you in raising your children. Lastly, remember “Just Jack” from ‘Will and Grace’ … he added a big importance to the word ‘Just’.
Congratulations on your new blogging arena. Good job!
You’re the second person to mention Jack!
Thankyou for your beautiful comment. I really appreciate it. xx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I remember when I was little and I hated my name. I wanted a normal name, like my middle name Ann, so I asked to be called just Ann. So my parents dutifully called me “Just Ann!” After a while I couldn’t cope with them wilfully misunderstanding me and I started answering to Kirsty again.
It is funny how the word “just” can have so many hidden meanings. You are not “just” anything, I’m pleased that you are believing that now too!
Kirsty @ My Home Truths recently posted..Escaping Reality
It’s great to see someone decide and then DO.
Your resolve is…. authentic. Well done
Kevin recently posted..Sometimes it all just works
Thanks Kevin. I refuse to be a person who just says ‘one day….’ Why put it off?
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I love so many things about this post
I love the duck, from the minute I saw him
Love the idea of being created by God and love the idea that you wrote and published this
Love the community that comes together, because of you, and not only on a Tuesday – it is so much more than that
xxx
Josefa @always Josefa recently posted..The White Rabbit
Thankyou Josefa. I appreciate your beautiful support. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I love the duck and I love this post. And can I just say that you are very much famous and I always feel a little bit special that someone so “In the know” in the blogging world takes the time to comment on my posts.
You have created a wonderful opportunity for other bloggers to have their work read and commented on. And for someone as new to the game as I was when I first found Diary of a SAHM, IBOT gave me my first chance to really have my stuff read.
You are wonderful not just just in anyway whatsoever
Thank you
Renay@mummysmiracles recently posted..Melbourne Cup Day (With Cupcakes)
Thanks Renay. That means so much to me. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I love that crazy arsed duckling!
Kim-Marie recently posted..Wine Selectors : Wine Review
Self love is not arrogant. It’s so refreshing to hear you write about yourself so. You should be proud of everything you’ve done.
Love your new site. It looks great. And your move seemed pretty seamless. xx
Zanni, Heart Mama recently posted..The ways of seeing
Thanks Zanni. You’re right it’s not arrogant, but it can come across as that. That’s what I was worried about.
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
[...] up with the beautiful Jess for IBOT at her new home Essentially Jess> Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first [...]
I LOVED this post. I’m guilty of the “just”. And yet, your words have really resonated with me. I am who He planned me to be. I am ME Child of God, beloved by him. Nothing “just” about that.
LittleWhiteDove recently posted..Bloggers Boogie :: 1982
Nothing Just about it at all. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
You are unique. You are you. The one and the only. So much is made worse buy comparisons to others…to envy or to long for other lifestyles and more….and then to stop & reflect & write, as you did Jess!
Go, girl. You have wings. You can fly and do what you want because you have words. Writing is a gift. You have poured your words into a magical and delightful post here & shared with us, friends you may not have yet met. You trust us with those words.
Jess, I’m so glad to know and love you.
Denyse xx
Denyse Whelan recently posted..I Remember.
Thankyou Denyse. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Loving the new look and happy Jess. You are really shining through in this post today, this is why I follow your blog. Your honest, genuine, fun and tell it like it is.
Congrats again on the successful launch of Essentially Jess x
Carly recently posted..Jamies 15 Minute Meal Challenge #1
So very well said. I love the term ‘Jessence’. Isn’t it such a wonderful feeling to realise that,you are enough, just the way you are.
Oh and I must say, I love the duck
So freeing to feel like who you are is enough. Nothing quite like it.
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
I really do love the re-brand, congrats on the jump to a place that is more you, and comfortable in being you. The duck is adorable too x
Kyla recently posted..Cavalo Nero, Haloumi, Mushroom & Avocado Tart
So not just jess. Totally JUST JESS and more! There is so much you should be proud of, especially the move from just to JUST xoxox
Tahlia @ the parenting files recently posted..my child could not hear
Thanks beautiful. xxx
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
Hi Jess. I remember what someone told me once when I said I was “just an administrator” at work (at a university). He said – “There’s no JUST. Your job is important.” I realised how I was being my own worst enemy by putting my self down with the word “just”. Thanks for this lovely, honest post. I will def join IBOT one of these days. That duck is too cute to pass up ; )
Thanks Kriscia. I’m glad you had that revelation.
Would love to have you for IBOT. It’s a fun linky.:)
Jess recently posted..My Week According to Instagram-Tales of a Domestic Goddess
[...] In being me. [...]
[...] saw the launch of the new rebranded Essentially Jess, with an awesome Launch Party to commemorate the day. I revealed some secrets that would not only [...]